I'm drive I can fine osifer
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
