Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
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