Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Randomize