I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
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