Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize