Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
