Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize