Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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