I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
You pole danced in your parka.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Randomize
