She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize