Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
