ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
