i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Randomize
