..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
