I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
