if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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