So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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