plz talk dirty to me
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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