Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
