God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Randomize
