Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
