i wish starbucks made bloody marys
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
