dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Bring me that man meat
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
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