I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
