omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
