This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Randomize
