Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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