Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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