S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
Randomize
