i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
