and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Randomize
