Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Randomize
