it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Randomize
