Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
