Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Randomize