they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize
