Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
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