You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Randomize
