Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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