At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
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