i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
