I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
If I die, sorry about rent.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
