A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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