just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Everclear isn't food dammit
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
