...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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