He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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