She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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