Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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