I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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