Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
nutella sex= disaster
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Randomize
